Working with kids in crisis - lesson from Luke 15

The Prodigal Son (Luke 15) illustrates a step by step process of walking away - then a step by step process of making it right. It comes from the back of my old Thompson Chain Reference Bible. 
Good food for thought.

The 7 steps away:
1. Selfwill: I want control, I want my way
2. Selfishness: Putting the action to my will - my selfwill comes to life
3. Separation: Beginning the process of pulling away from what I had (family, rules, expectations, God...)
4: Sensuality: I want to feel good - it's all about me, me, me
5. Spiritual destitution: My decisions are making my life worse, I'm in a pit and I know it
6. Self abasement: In a cycle of deeper and deeper. I'm in the basement - sucking concrete but I'm unwilling to give in
7: Starvation: I'm at my end. There's is no lower place. I long for anything. 

The 7 steps back:
1. Realization: The ah-ha moment when it dawns on you that this sucks and it needs to change.
2. Resolution: Decision time. I am going do deal with this, get off my butt & do something about it.
3. Repentance: I was heading one way; I stop, turn around and head the other way. I'm am putting action to my resolution.
4. Return: Physically retrace your steps and head back to the beginning. This takes humility.
5. Reconciliation: Making it right. Don't just go back. Go back and deal with it well and set things right.
6. Re-clothing: This part is out of my control. To be forgiven completely and restored to the original status. 
7. Rejoicing: Celebrate it.

Understanding these steps might help us work with kids in crisis more effectively.


Dave Brotherton was a youth pastor from 1984-2006 and now teaches youth ministry at Ambrose University College in Calgary. Dave is also the National Youth Guy for the Alliance churches in Canada and the director of Legacy Youth Conference. Dave is married to Lisa and they share 2 of the greatest kids in the world. Fishing, camping, and cheering on the Leafs are some of his favorite things. 
twitter: @oldbrotherdave

Dave Brotherton

Beer, Food, & Student Ministry at Christmas

Probably you've noticed, but attitudes towards Christmas food and drink are often at odds with each other. 

On one hand, we rightly applaud the many volunteers of the Operation Red Nose campaign for keeping the eggnog and rum off the road. On the other hand, we sing songs that include phrases like “Oh, bring us a figgy pudding…and a cup of good cheer/We won’t go until we get some, so bring some out here.” In other words, nobody is planning to leave the party until they’ve had their fill of “Christmas cheer,” which, in all likelihood, is referring to a cup of Christmas beer, as opposed to a cup full of Christmas good times.

On the topic of alcohol, while many churches and pastors condemn the over-indulgence of holiday spirits, it is also not uncommon for these same people to eat until they could actually fill out that big jolly red suit. While gym memberships and bottle recyclers make a fortune in January, excess of both food and drink are explicitly condemned throughout Christian Scripture. In the church, well-mixed hops get the evil-eye and the roasted turkey gets a feast. 

Why is this?

Most feasts, by the way, are meant to be shared with our families and loved ones. Yet the extra hours and stress spent at work so that we can somehow manage to pay the over-inflated Christmas prices are, at best, taken out on our families in the form of fighting, dysfunction, and all around Grinchyness. 

Unfortunately, many of the homes and families your youth ministry touches, the turkey isn’t the only one to be feathered and skinned in the mad rush for consumption during the holiday season. Kids feel it the most. 

Anyhow, all this to say, during Christmas season fight the urge to make your youth ministry calendar busier than it already is. Slow it down, give families room to breathe, and let your youth ministry be characterized by the mystery and anticipation of Emanuel, God with us.

Singer, songwriter, and author Michael Card says it this way, “The celebration of the birth of Jesus should be ever new, however; the scenery of Christmas has become too familiar and comfortable. It blocks our view into the depth of the stark mystery of it all…Perhaps the reason so many of us find it difficult to celebrate the birthday of Jesus is that we have confined the celebration, in many ways, to a single day… and, at that, a day that’s become more cluttered than any other day of the year, a day that better represents the noise and business of all our other days.”

Happy Ho! Ho!

-Jer

Jeremy is a youth ministry veteran based out of Whistler, BC. You can stalk him on Twitter or find reasons not to like him via www.whistlerisawesome.com where he sits as Editor-In-Chief. 

How To Measure Discipleship?

Reggie McNeal in his book Missional Renaissance suggests the primary way discipleship is most often measured is:

1. How much (you give),
2. How often (you participate), and
3. How many (other’s are doing the same).

When we measure the discipleship process by participation rather than maturation, we’re leading and pastoring poorly. What do you think? Do you stand at the back of a Sunday gathering with a clipboard and a checklist? Or do you only mentally do it during staff meetings?

• “Johnny Youth Group just bowed in worship, he is really moving up as a disciple. Check.”
• “Oh look, Johnny Youth Group just dropped an envelope in the plate as it went by. Remind me to investigate whether his giving is generous and sacrificial. Partial check.”
• “Johnny Youth Group just signed up to be a student leader! That’s great. Let’s give him two check marks for that.”
• “Johnny Youth Group missed church last week. Minus one check mark.”
• “Johnny Youth Group's dad drinks beer with his co-workers. Minus one check mark + minus two check marks because we probably shouldn't be hosting youth group at his house.”
• “Johnny Youth Group just completed the third round of discipleship classes. Great job! We forgive the beer-thing.Check.”
• “Johnny Youth Group brought a friend to church. Two checks (and maybe a video testimony).”
• “Johnny Youth Group declines video testimony. Minus one.”

Discipleship is not marked by people’s participation, busyness, or activity. In fact, very often it is the busyness of church and youth ministry activity that actually slows discipleship development in people. Simply, participation does not equal maturation.

I wonder then, what are the things we should measure if we were going to measure Christian maturation?

Jeremy Postal is the director of Whistler School, a bible and discipleship school based out of beautiful Whistler, BC. He is passionate about building communities of restoration & creativity with Christ as the focus. You can also catch him regularly on his blog at www.jeremypostal.com or connect via Twitter @JeremyPostal. 

Student Ministry in The Trenches: A Story

Following is a short letter that I received a few years ago from one of our high school workers volunteering in a local high school. I love this story partly because I know and have walked with this student for years and partly because it shows a larger picture of why we do youth ministry! 

If you're a youth worker, paid or volunteer, thank you for sharing your life and energy with the next generation of game changers! This story is about you and the impact you and your life, church, and ministry has in the life of students. Please read this slightly edited version (names changed), take a moment to pray for the students in your youth ministry, and then pass the story on.

Student Ministry is more than large events. It's all about in-the-trenches relationships. Photo: Jeremy Postal @ Historymakers, Abbotsford, BC

Jeremy,

I thought I would send you this encouraging story about our campus pastor ministry at (local high school). Last Thursday I spent the entire school day at school. It was a strangely busy day with students and many students were in the centre with a lot of various issues. I sat with 4 boys doing work, talking through home life, and stuff for the first two periods then, in the 3rd period, a student named Caleb came in. We spent time working with this student last year...anyways…without going into too much detail, this student, though an amazingly bright kid, is and has been involved with some severe drug addiction and family trouble.

Caleb is trying to stop using drugs as they are becoming a destructive hold in his life. He shared his biggest goal is to get through high school. Through an amazing 2.5 hour discussion it came to a particular point in conversation whereby we sort of in a round about way talked about Jesus, Life, the bible, sin, new Life in Jesus, and God being a rescuer. It was amazing! At one point I had to actually stop the conversation, because we were totally about to pray in the counseling centre...!

Anyways, as the day progressed it became clear that Caleb had hit a new low and is looking for some hope and some motivation for life. He was being kicked out of the school – however - after our conversation, exchange of contact info, and an invitation to youth, I spoke with the program director. 

The program director said that his major leverage to keep Caleb in school was the fact that the student showed lots of interest in me (the campus pastor) and our church's youth program. The program director said that he viewed "the church youth group as an advocate for high school students," and that he sees our group and students as a "tremendous resources for students’ success in the community and high school."

- Campus Pastor.

Wow! How amazing would it be if every youth ministry in our country was known like this? Youth pastors, workers, and volunteers - what you do is significant and changes lives. Keep at it, don't give up, walk through life with students, and keep advocating for them. We love what you do.

Jeremy Postal is the director of Whistler School, a bible and discipleship school based out of beautiful Whistler, BC. He is passionate about building communities of restoration & creativity with Christ as the focus. You can also catch him regularly on his blog at www.jeremypostal.com or connect via Twitter @JeremyPostal. 

5 Reasons I'm Excited About Youth Ministry in Canada

Hi there. 

My name is Jeremy Postal and I’m new to this little corner of the interweb. It’s good to be here and thanks for reading; I’m really hoping we’ll have the chance to connect at some point and share together our insights on student ministry in Canada.

In approaching my first blog post for Canadian Youth Worker I thought it’d be good to somehow introduced myself but, as I’ve been sitting here staring at a blank screen, I realize the difficulty of an introduction with me over here and you all the way over there. So, instead creep through my bio  and, in the mean time, I’ll tell you 5 reasons why I’m really excited to be writing here at Canadian Youth Worker.

1. I’ve been involved with next gen mission + ministry for over a decade and absolutely love connecting with other youth workers. I hope this will be a platform for connection with youth workers from circles I don’t typically roll with. Here is my email, my blog, my Facebook, and my Twitter – let’s connect.

2. I absolutely believe in the future of the Canadian church and I believe youth ministry is one of the catalysts of its present healing and future health.

3. Canadian youth culture is a massive mission field filled with students whose parent’s are post-Christian. Where does that leave students? Often with never having heard or had any experience with the Gospel – ever! Next gen ministry in Canada is now, more than ever, filled with the greatest urgency.

4. I’m completely dissatisfied with the number of young people who leave their faith upon high school graduation. I want to be part of a movement with other Canadian leaders who will call them back.

5. I want to, through this blog, inspire, encourage, mentor, and equip young and rookie youth pastors as they start out in student ministry. The first couple of years have a steep learning curve and we need you – all of you – to push through!

Whether you’re in a local church or para-church context, a paid or volunteer youth worker, or living on the west coast, the prairies, central Canada, or the east coast; for the future of our nation we’re all in this together. If you, like me, hold student ministry at the core of your calling and passion, let’s stand together, learn from each other, connect with each other, and be bastions of hope in a culture grasping for the frayed edges of what little hope they barely see.  

I’ll leave you with a quote by author Len Sweet as a means of self-reflection:

“Light illumines the darkness. If there’s darkness, the blame should be attached where it belongs; not to the world that is dark but to the church which is failing to provide the light.”

Let’s not fail the darkness by not being light.

-Jer 

Jeremy Postal is the director of Whistler School, a bible and discipleship school based out of beautiful Whistler, BC. He is passionate about building communities of restoration & creativity with Christ as the focus. You can also catch him regularly on his blog at www.jeremypostal.com.  

When Great Ideas Don't Turn Out So Great

I remember it like it was yesterday, a youth night like no other. The church foyer was filled with students, many ripe with excitement and others ripe with body odor. There was much anticipation about a game that was rumored to be played that night and for weeks leading up to it snippets of what could be were flying around the group. The students arrived in clothes that “could get dirty” and the girls were obviously not as excited as the boys. As the students filed into the gym, lights low seeing two bases made of cardboard boxes sat at opposing ends of the gym ready for a siege.

The excitement was pierced when the youth intern pulled the trigger on the Mega-phone and bellowed into the mic “ITS TIME TO PLAY TROUT-A-PULT”. As you can imagine, the high fiving amongst the guys began nearly immediately as did the steady stream of sudden and severe ailments that our young ladies began to experience that would not allow them to participate. The teams were divided and the rules explained.

The Premise: Using a water balloon launcher, each team was given several large rainbow trout that they would use to launch at the other teams base. Each team would alternate shots and the first team to knock down the other teams base was victorious. Seemed logical, they throw fish around at Pike Place Market in Seattle every day and nothing seems to go wrong there.

MISTAKE #1: The water balloon launcher was rated for 200 yards of distance, which would not be a problem except that our gym is only 50 yards long.

MISTAKE #2: Hours earlier when the new intern went to buy the fish. He chose to save the Church some money (an honorable move) and bought frozen fish instead of fresh as they were on sale and much cheaper. This would not have been a big deal, that is if he did not elect to defrost the shrink-wrapped fish in a sink of hot water.

The Outcome: The game ended as fast as it started, as the first fish was loaded up into the launcher and the very excited boys leaned back as hard as they could to ensure that the fish would travel far enough. As the guy on the trigger let go, it all went completely wrong. First, the sling shot attempted to propel the fish 4 times farther than the gym was long. It left the launcher at incredible speeds, and is it did, the speed exposed the other mistake that was made. Defrosting a fish in hot water does more than defrost, it cooks the fish, the result being that instead of one cohesive fish unit flying at light speed across the gym, it was now thousands of smaller pieces.

As what remained of the once mighty trout approached the other side of the gym, pieces peppered the opposing team, landing in student’s hair, on their clothes, and in their mouths causing them to scramble for their lives. The bulk of the fish missed the students, but instead hit the wall behind them, which would not have been a problem had it not lodged into the church’s air intake vent on the wall. The fish smell lingered for nearly a week throughout the church, and the Trout-A-Pult will be go down as the worst game we ever played.

Moral of the Story: There are many great reasons that custodial staff may never like the youth ministry and this is one of them, but its stories like this that will live on in infamy among our students and leaders. It may have been a disaster, but no one got hurt and the memories will last a lifetime and eight years later the story still gets told around campfires and youth ministry conventions. Students don’t care if the game goes as planned, they just want to have fun doing it and it can be the disaster games that are the most fun, youth ministry isn’t always serious and being ridiculous can be a good thing from time to time.

Geoff Stewart is the Youth Pastor at Peace Portal Alliance Church in Surrey B.C. where he oversees Journey Student Ministries. He is married to Lavonne and they have two cats, Norman and Puff Daddy. Geoff Blogs all over the place and tweets often, but not TOO often. Follow him on twitter @geoffcstewart.