Know Your Role

On our Alaskan cruise last month, we went to get family portraits done in the ship’s photography studio.  The 30-minute shoot went very quickly, and at its conclusion we booked an appointment to go back later in the week to look at the pictures (and perhaps buy some).

We decided that 4 of us would go:  Gail, my brother Jason, my mom Joyce, and me.  We felt that this particular combination of people would give us the best chance of making a good decision without paying too much.

We all had our particular roles too.

I was the “Schmoozer” (surprise surprise) and my job was to break the ice and create a comfortable atmosphere before we talked big bucks.

My brother Jason was our “Quality Control Expert” as he by far has the most expertise with respect to photography and editing.

My lovely wife Gail was the “Negotiator/Closer”.  She knows how to drive a hard bargain and is not afraid to be tough if she needs to.

Lastly, my mom Joyce was the “Benefactor/Banker”.  The buck stopped with her as she was the one ultimately paying for the pictures.

We decided on these roles to take advantage of our respective strengths.  For example, Gail had no interest in making small talk with the photographer; she left that to me and my gift of gab.  And I didn’t dare try to bargain as I am a complete push-over.  In fact, the other three kicked me out of the room when it was time to move closer towards a purchasing decision.  We worked well as a team and ended up happy with the pictures we purchased.

When it comes to youth ministry leadership, it’s extremely crucial that you know your role and understand how your own strengths and weaknesses as an individual help contribute to the bigger picture. 

Here are 4 important things to keep in mind with respect to knowing your role in youth ministry:

1.  Know what you’re good at

At 40 years old (and 21 years in youth ministry), I have a pretty good sense of what I’m good at.  I enjoy speaking, facilitating, and teaching.  I have good relational ministry skills and strong communication skills.  When I’m able to combine these skills effectively, I feel confident in my ministry.  Thus, I’m always looking for opportunities to utilize these skills both at the archdiocesan and parish levels.

Likewise, you may have certain gifts and talents that make you a better youth ministry leader.  It’s important that you continue to hone your craft and sharpen your skills.  I would encourage you to try and become an “expert” or at least a resource in one or two areas of ministry.  It will help you with your confidence and inspire others around you to do the same.

2.  Know what you’re not good at

By contrast, I have a long list of things that I’m not good at.  Dancing.  Art.  Memorizing scripture.  Dressing nicely.  Cooking.   In youth ministry, I don’t think it’s worth wasting time working on your weaknesses.  I am convinced it’s more important to develop and refine your strengths and then lead from them.  Thus, you’ll never see me trying to choreograph a dance routine or offer to bake snacks for the next youth gathering.

It’s important to acknowledge your deficiencies, especially within the confines of a leadership team.  But that’s the beauty of having a team of people – if you’re not good at something chances are someone else on the team is!  Now I’m not saying that you should never strive to improve or that you shouldn’t learn new skills.  But there is a time and place to do these things and you’ll need to exercise good judgement in picking your spots.

3.  It’s not about you

I learned this the hard way early on in my youth ministry career.  Back when I first started, I wanted to be “The Man”.  I wanted to be in every skit, deliver every talk, lead every prayer, and coordinate every ice-breaker.  I don’t think it was a lack of trust in my fellow leaders; rather it was my ego running rampant in my attempt to be the best youth ministry leader I could be.

I found that I was starting to push other leaders away with my self-centered approach.  Thankfully, I was able to change my ways as I matured.  We must remember that our primary goal in youth ministry is to lead young people closer to Christ, and not to ourselves.  We are to always be looking for opportunities to help young people encounter Jesus.  We need to be a conduit – not an obstacle – to making that happen.

4.  Be genuine

It’s my favourite youth ministry mantra:  young people won’t care how much we know until they know how much we care.  In our work with young people, we must earn the right to be heard.  When possible, we need to build genuine relationships with young people before we attempt to evangelize or catechize them.

A big part of this is being genuine with young people. That means being honest with our strengths and weaknesses and admitting when we don’t know the answer to a question or if we’re unsure about something.  Teens are very smart and extremely perceptive – they’ll know if we’re faking it.  So it’s important that you don’t strive to be the most popular leader or pretend to be something that you’re not.  Be humble and trusting enough to depend on other members of your team.


So forget your ego, your popularity, and your weaknesses.  Be a genuine witness of Christ’s love and mercy and do everything you can to help young people experience this love.

That’s our role as youth ministry leaders.

Clayton Imoo is husband to Gail and father to sons Sean Isaiah and Jacob Isaac and daughter Kayla Marie.  He has served as the Director of the Office of Youth and Young Adult Ministry of the Roman Catholic Archdiocese of Vancouver for the past ten years, helping parishes develop their own youth and young adult ministries.  When not doing ministry, Clay enjoys spending time with his family, playing music, playing sports, playing naptime, and writing blogs on topics such as family, faith, and the Vancouver Canucks.  Learn more about him at http://www.claytonimoo.com or follow him @claytonimoo

Swinging for the Fences

With pro baseball player Vernon Wells.

Last week, I was blessed to spend a week in Fort Worth, Texas for the second consecutive year.  I served as a trainer for YouthLeader and had the opportunity to help high school youth (and their youth ministers) develop their leadership skills (in a Christian context) through a week of sessions, prayers, games, socials, and more.  I was inspired by the enthusiasm and desire of the young people I met. 

When YouthLeader ended on Friday, I spent 24 hours with my good friends Marie and Mike and their 5 wonderful children.  On Friday night, we went to watch Andrew (the oldest child) play baseball.  It was a really fun night as we were treated to some decent hardball (especially for 9 and 10 year olds) and I got to meet and take a picture with ex-Toronto Blue Jay – and 3 time MLB All-Star – Vernon Wells.  He’s one of the coaches of Andrew’s team.

The game came down to the last inning and Andrew’s team was up to bat down 6-4 with 2 out and the bases loaded.  One of Andrew’s teammates walked up to the plate, and I just so happened to be standing next to the batter’s dad.

Pitch 1 was a ball.

Pitch 2 was a strike (the boy didn’t swing).

Pitch 3 was a ball.

Pitch 4 was a strike (once again, the boy watched the ball cross the plate).

Pitch 5 was a ball.

Now we had a full count of 3 balls and 2 strikes.  With 2 out.  And the bases loaded.  This had all the makings for a hero moment.

“Come on...you need to swing the bat!” the father implored his son.

Pitch 6 was a strike right down the middle. The bat never left the boy’s shoulder.  Game over.

“If you want to hit, you need to swing the bat,” the father mumbled to himself as we applauded the efforts of both teams.

Was the young boy intimidated by the pitcher?  Maybe.  Not prepared enough?  Perhaps.  Feeling the pressure?  Likely.

Often in youth ministry, we may feel intimidated, unprepared, or pressured.  We may withhold or withdraw because we don’t want to make a mistake. Or we’re afraid or failing.

But fear is not of the Lord!  In 2 Timothy 1:7 we hear “For God did not give us a spirit of cowardice, but rather a spirit of power and of love and of self-discipline.”

We must SWING FOR THE FENCES!

Here are 4 ways we can swing for the fences in youth ministry:

1.  Make the extra effort.  Youth ministry can be draining.  It can be disheartening when you put so much work into a night and only a handful of teens show up.  Teens can be high-maintenance, and they don’t always say thank you and they may not pray for the leaders.  But despite all of this, they will notice when you put in the extra effort.  It might be spending a bit more time making decorations for the next event, seeking out a costume for an upcoming skit, or devoting a few extra minutes to respond to emails, Facebook messages, and tweets.  The answer to the question of “Is this worth it?” is almost always an unequivocal yes.  Doing that little bit extra might make the difference between a young person coming back to your youth ministry gatherings or staying home.

2.  Don’t be afraid to make a mistake.  Now I’m not talking about careless and care-free mistakes here.  But I am talking about practical risk-taking.  Sometimes, we need to just let our imaginations fly!   Our volunteers should not feel bogged down by bureaucracy.  Without some freedom, volunteers will lose their enthusiasm quickly.  So if you’re used to delivering a talk or teaching from a script, next time use cue cards or memorize the whole thing.  Or maybe you could try some new and crazy icebreakers for the very first time.  Trust that the other volunteers and leadership will have your back and bail you out if necessary.  We all need to take risks, even at the expense of failing.  After all, the only person who never makes a mistake is the one who never tries anything.

3.  Aim high.  There’s is nothing inspiring or satisfying about reaching a goal that you set too low.  Thus, I’d encourage you to ask yourself questions like “What will success look like?” or “What’s something we haven’t tried before?” as opposed to “How can we get by?” or “What’s the safest route?”  When we aim high, we stretch out of our comfort zones and we often surprise ourselves with what we can accomplish.  When young people see us aiming high and not being complacent, they will want to do the same.  Our goals should be challenging, yet realistic and practical.  But as long as we aim high, we won’t get stagnant, and we – and our ministry – will continue to grow.

4.  Be confident.  If we are genuine in our intent, then we can be confident that God will work in us and through us.  After all, we are ordinary people in the hands of an extraordinary God.  If we are called to serve in youth ministry, then we must have confidence that we are making an impact in the lives of the young people we are ministering to and with.  It’s through our witness, our conversations, and our relationships.  We are their affirmers, their cheerleaders, and their advocates.  We must believe that if God leads us to it, then He’ll lead us through it.  Sometimes we may feel tired, lazy, and unworthy to serve.  But God asks us to look beyond our so-called “inadequacies” or “deficiencies” and trust in Him; that His grace will be sufficient for us.


When we make the extra effort, when we’re not afraid to make a mistake, when we aim high, and when we’re confident, then we will inspire and motivate others – young and old alike.  And in turn, they will inspire us right back.  Such was the case with the amazing young people of Texas last week. Their desire to strengthen their relationships with God rubbed off on me and made me want to do the same.

So the next time you’re up to bat in your youth ministry, make sure you swing away!

It’s the only way you’re going to hit a home run.


In what ways do/can you swing for the fences in your youth ministry?










Clayton Imoo is husband to Gail and father to sons Sean Isaiah and Jacob Isaac and daughter Kayla Marie.  He has served as the Director of the Office of Youth and Young Adult Ministry of the Roman Catholic Archdiocese of Vancouver for the past ten years, helping parishes develop their own youth and young adult ministries.  When not doing ministry, Clay enjoys spending time with his family, playing music, playing sports, playing naptime, and writing blogs on topics such as family, faith, and the Vancouver Canucks.  Learn more about him at http://www.claytonimoo.com or follow him @claytonimoo

Gimme a Break!

When it comes to our youth ministry leaders, it’s a common tendency to fall into the mindset of “keeping them at all costs”.  We fear losing them forever and we sometimes fail to see that it might be worth suffering some short-term pain for some long-term gain.

There are many reasons why leaders leave ministry, including (but not limited to) burnout, lack of support/guidance, lack of training, lack of opportunities for growth, conflicts within the team/ministry, change of heart/desire, feelings of inadequacy or insignificance, changes in life/family/job, moral failures and not feeling appreciated/affirmed.

When one of our leaders comes to us and desires a break because of one or more of the above reasons, we must have the foresight and humility to grant the request.  I would much rather have someone take some time off from youth ministry leadership to get his business in order and come back stronger than keep someone for too long and then have him quit forever.    

Like many things in ministry, it sounds simple in theory but it’s not easy in practice.  Often, it’s hard to find good youth ministry volunteers so we’d rather cut off one of our limbs than lose one.  We worry about how someone stepping down looks to the teens, parents and other church members.  We try to convince them that things will eventually work themselves out and they should just keep on keeping on.

But if the leader is not in the right frame of mind, then keeping him on the team is doing him, the teens, and the ministry overall a disservice.

Youth ministry is not just about leading young people to an encounter with Jesus Christ.  It’s also about mentoring and leadership development.

When one of our leaders tells us he needs a break, let’s have the wisdom to grant his wish.

It’s simply the right thing to do.

Clayton Imoo is husband to Gail and father to sons Sean Isaiah and Jacob Isaac and daughter Kayla Marie.  He has served as the Director of the Office of Youth and Young Adult Ministry of the Roman Catholic Archdiocese of Vancouver for the past ten years, helping parishes develop their own youth and young adult ministries.  When not doing ministry, Clay enjoys spending time with his family, playing music, playing sports, playing naptime, and writing blogs on topics such as family, faith, and the Vancouver Canucks.  Learn more about him at http://www.claytonimoo.com or follow him @claytonimoo 

Changes in Leadership

Today, the Roman Catholic Archdiocese of Vancouver announced its annual pastoral appointments.  Basically, every July some priests changes parishes: head pastors move churches, some assistant pastors become head pastors, and other priests move into specialized roles, move out of the archdiocese, or retire.

At my home parish of St. Paul's, we are once again affected by the changes, as we will be getting our 3rd assistant pastor in 3 years.  It's not a bad thing, as our church is looked at as one of the most dynamic in our archdiocese and a great place for priests to hone their ministry.

In reflecting on this transition, I started to relate it to youth ministry (surprise, surprise).  In particular, it underscored for me the importance of having a good transition plan in place when a parish youth ministry coordinator or youth minister moves on…for whatever reason. 

(As a side-note, It's neat that this blog comes a day after Jason's post of transition.)

It’s happened before:  a popular, highly-competent and highly-effective youth ministry coordinator leaves a parish and youth ministry seemingly leaves with her.  The parish is apparently caught off-guard (even though it knew this day was coming) and youth ministry has a hard time recovering, if at all.  All because the church’s youth ministry efforts were tied directly to its leader and not to the community.

Part of my role is to aid in this vital transition period so youth ministry doesn’t fall off the map in both the eyes of the pastor and the church community.  Thus, I offer three ways to ensure that youth ministry doesn’t leave with the outgoing youth minister.

1.  Mentoring.  Youth ministry is a prime opportunity for solid mentoring and leadership development.  Even the best youth ministers know that they aren’t going to be around forever; the smartest ones will realize this before it’s too late.  A strong leader should be able to identify and perhaps even groom one or two people to take his spot…without feeling threatened.  Leadership always needs to be evolving….otherwise our ministry isn’t growing.

2.  Create a Job Description and Procedures.  You might be turned off by reading this one thinking that it’s way too much work.  Realize that I’m not talking about lengthy, complicated, air-tight dissertations here.  But I am talking about concise, pointed documents that will bring consistency and transparency to the ministry.  Thus, I encourage you to spend some time creating some of these documents.  The last thing you want to happen is for someone to leave and to take all of the “trade secrets” with her.

3.  Know what you are doing and why.  If we are truly doing our job as youth ministers of leading young people to an encounter with Jesus Christ, then it shouldn’t matter just who on the team is doing it.  Ideally, young people will relate youth ministry to a multitude of people rather than to just one person.  Youth ministry is more than one pastor, one priest, or one youth minister.  We’ll know we’re doing it right when a prominent leader leaves yet the young people stay.

I pray that all of our youth ministries are designed so young people relate their leaders to youth ministry, and not the other way around.  That way, when it’s indeed someone’s time to move on, young people will be able to see that it’s a natural part of growth and evolution.

Then it won’t be so hard to say goodbye.


Clayton Imoo is husband to Gail and father to sons Sean Isaiah and Jacob Isaac and daughter Kayla Marie.  He has served as the Director of the Office of Youth and Young Adult Ministry of the Roman Catholic Archdiocese of Vancouver for the past ten years, helping parishes develop their own youth and young adult ministries.  When not doing ministry, Clay enjoys spending time with his family, playing music, playing sports, playing naptime, and writing blogs on topics such as family, faith, and the Vancouver Canucks.  Learn more about him at http://www.claytonimoo.com or follow him @claytonimoo      

Reckless Abandon

This evening, at the conclusion of our religious education classes at our church, one little boy was left waiting to be picked up.  Five minutes passed, then ten.  Ten became fifteen, fifteen became twenty, and twenty became twenty-five.  Finally, his grandfather came to the door thirty minutes after classes had ended and all the other students had gone home.  Sadly, there wasn’t an apology or thank you...only a nod of acknowledgement after I reminded him to be on time for pick-up.

Conversely, the student was very polite and appreciative of our patience.  In between his phone calls home to see who was going to pick him up, we had a great conversation about school, shopping, and the importance of good hygiene.  To his credit, the 10 year-old was not scared or worried, and he gave me a sincere “Thanks for waiting with me” when he was leaving...in stark contrast to his grandfather.  While grateful for the time and chat, I felt sad that he had to wait (and not just because he had to talk to me...haha) – it felt like he was abandoned – even for a short time.

It got me thinking about times that we abandon teens in our youth ministry.

A couple of qualifications here: I’m aware that there are different ways to define “abandon”, but for these purposes I will focus on its meaning as leaving or forsaking something or someone.  Furthermore, I’ll be looking at more figurative examples as opposed to literal ones:  thankfully I’ve never left a teen somewhere...at least to my knowledge. :p

Here are three ways that we may abandon teens:

1.  When we get intimidated or uncomfortable.  Reaching out to certain teens isn’t easy; in fact it can downright frightening.  Quite often, we jump to conclusions about people (all people and not just teens) whether it’s how people dress, talk, act or choose to hang around with.  As youth ministers, it’s vital to recognize when we are doing this and to fight through it and not let it affect our ministry.

It certainly is tricky.  For instance, I’ve ministered alongside some really great youth leaders who “favoured” certain teens (to varying degrees); and because of the time and attention, some of them have grown up to be outstanding leaders in their own right.  I know that I’m guilty of this as well – I admit that it’s much easier to spend time with those who seem to make ministry easier for us.   However, I often lament the teens that slipped through the cracks of my parish youth ministry because I or other leaders simply didn’t take the time to connect with them or to stretch out of our comfort zones.  I just pray that someone else was able to do what I didn’t do.

2.  When they “let us down”.  Often in youth ministry, we put a lot of hope and faith into the teens we minister to and with (as we should).  We may try to live vicariously through them or we may see a younger version of ourselves in them.  Thus, we may expect them to act a certain way, to speak using certain language, or to make certain decisions.  But what happens when they don’t do what we want them to do?

Logically, the best answer is that we should stand by them and guide them through the said situation by providing a prudent level of guidance and support.  However, I’ve seen it go the other way as well:  youth leaders who get frustrated or disappointed with the teens to a point where it compounds the problem.  They may use words such as “I’m disappointed in you” or “I hope you learned your lesson”. 

Speaking from experience, it’s ridiculously easy to put too much pressure on young people.  They already have enough pressure on them: from their parents, school, job, peers, media, society, and more – they certainly don’t need a youth minister breathing down their neck too.  We are called to love young people despite their (and our own) imperfections.  How we react in the face of adversity (theirs and ours) says a lot about our character.  Teens need us to love them and not to judge them.

3.  When they abandon us.  How good are we at seeking out the lost sheep?  Or are we so wrapped up in our programs that we forget about people?  When it comes to relational ministry, we need to accept that a lot of times it is going to feel like it’s only going one way.  That is, we may initiative all of the contact and show up at all the sporting events and concerts only to have the young person not show up to our youth ministry gatherings. 

I liken it to the age-old dilemma of birthday party or wedding invitations.  It doesn’t make any sense to use the thinking of “I will invite them only if they invited me to theirs’ first”.  Because if both sides subscribed to that theory, no one would make the first move!  Same goes for our youth ministry: we can’t water down our relational ministry efforts if it seems like the commitment isn’t being reciprocated.  In fact, it should be the exact opposite: that’s the time to ramp things up!

Remember, youth ministry should be about people and not programs.  We should be interested in souls and not attendance.  If we are firmly committed to this, we won’t need to worry about abandoning teens.

Clayton Imoo is husband to Gail and father to sons Sean Isaiah and Jacob Isaac and daughter Kayla Marie.  He has served as the Director of the Office of Youth and Young Adult Ministry of the Roman Catholic Archdiocese of Vancouver for the past ten years.  Learn more about him at http://www.claytonimoo.com or follow him @claytonimoo

It’s So Hard to Say Goodbye: Transition in Leadership

This past Sunday, our assistant pastor said goodbye to our parish after three years of faithful service to our parish community.  As Father Swann Kim reflected on his time at St. Paul’s at the end of Mass (one year as a deacon and two years as a priest), he choked up in a touching and genuine display of emotion.  On cue, many in the congregation (including this writer) had to wipe away tears as we listened to Fr. Swann speak about how we had all become his family and that he was sad to move on.

Fr. Swann won’t be too far as he takes up residence at Our Lady of Assumption Parish in Port Coquitlam.  As with many of the priests who have lived with and learned from Monsignor Luterbach, Fr. Swann will likely become a pastor somewhere in the not-so-distant future.  Life at St. Paul Parish will go on, in large part to the strong leadership of Msgr. Luterbach and countless others in the parish community.  As well, we are all excited as to what our new assistant pastor Father Rodney Nootebos will bring to our parish.

In reflecting on this transition, I started to relate it to youth ministry (surprise, surprise).  In particular, it underscored for me the importance of having a good transition plan in place when a parish youth ministry coordinator or youth minister moves on...for whatever reason. 

It’s happened before:  a popular, highly-competent and highly-effective youth ministry coordinator leaves a parish and youth ministry seemingly leaves with her.  The parish is apparently caught off-guard (even though it knew this day was coming) and youth ministry has a hard time recovering, if at all.  All because the church’s youth ministry efforts were tied directly to its leader and not to the community.

Part of my role is to aid in this vital transition period so youth ministry doesn’t fall off the map in both the eyes of the pastor and the church community.  Thus, I offer three ways to ensure that youth ministry doesn’t leave with the outgoing youth minister:

1.     Mentoring.  Youth ministry is a prime opportunity for solid mentoring and leadership development.  Even the best youth ministers know that they aren’t going to be around forever; the smartest ones will realize this before it’s too late.  A strong leader should be able to identify and perhaps even groom one or two people to take his spot...without feeling threatened.  Leadership always needs to be evolving....otherwise our ministry isn’t growing.      

2.     Create a Job Description & Procedures.  You might be turned off by reading this one thinking that it’s way too much work.  Realize that I’m not talking about lengthy, complicated, air-tight dissertations here.  But I am talking about concise, pointed documents that will bring consistency and transparency to the ministry.  Thus, I encourage you to spend some time creating some of these documents.  The last thing you want to happen is for someone to leave and to take all of the “trade secrets” with her.

3.    Know what you are doing and why.  If we are truly doing our job as youth ministers of leading young people to an encounter with Jesus Christ, then it shouldn’t matter just who on the team is doing it.  Ideally, young people will relate youth ministry to a multitude of people rather than to just one person.  Youth ministry is more than one pastor, one priest, or one youth minister.  We’ll know we’re doing it right when a prominent leader leaves yet the young people stay.

I pray that all of our youth ministries are designed so young people relate their leaders to youth ministry, and not the other way around.  That way, when it’s indeed someone’s time to move on, young people will be able to see that it’s a natural part of growth and evolvement.

Then it won’t be so hard to say goodbye.

Clayton Imoo is husband to Gail and father to sons Sean Isaiah and Jacob Isaac and daughter Kayla Marie.  He has served as the Director of the Office of Youth and Young Adult Ministry of the Roman Catholic Archdiocese of Vancouver for the past ten years, helping parishes develop their own youth and young adult ministries.  When not doing ministry, Clay enjoys spending time with his family, playing music, playing sports, playing naptime, and writing blogs on topics such as family, faith, and the Vancouver Canucks.  Learn more about him at http://www.claytonimoo.com or follow him @claytonimoo