"...Just because they're in a church, it doesn't mean that
everyone has it all together. My advice would be to talk about things that
are real and relevant to today's youth." - Katelyn 17
Can you relate to issues of divorce, blended families,
cutting, rape, and random texts of topless girls when you have never experienced it
yourself? It’s not an option, YOU NEED TO RELATE! In this blog, I will show you
how you can connect with your teen audience in a world that is not your own.
Speak The Language Of Pain And Their Trust You Will Gain.
I have a list. A list that helps me speak the language of
pain. Not just any pain, but
the pain and experiences
that youth
go through. I started this document back in 2006 it’s called
Teen Issues: X Marks the Spot (In this blog I will refer to it as
The List). In this document I lists various issues/topics that teens face from bullying, to blended families, being the class clown, to being judged in the church. Beside the topic I have written a detailed
description of what teens experience and face, according to the topic.
Bullying:
People you don’t know jump you, they shove, push and beat on you. You
walk close to the lockers because you’ve learned it lessens the pain when they shove
you into them.
That description of bullying may not make sense to you. But
a young guy who hears you say those words in your message, will lift his head
and look into your eyes. His ears perk up because you are speaking his language,
the language of his pain. To him, it feels like you can see right through him,
you see his pain, you understand. He now hangs off of every
word that proceeds out of your mouth including the message of hope. That same
boy will come up to you after the message is over and share his secret life of silent
torture with you because you get him. You spoke the language of pain.
“I think
a youth pastor should be willing to stay in touch with youth culture (ex.
current video games, celebrities, etc.) and use current language.”- Hunter 19
How do you develop this list? Through the gift of listening.
A friend shared his story about how he was bullied in Junior and Senior High School. Everyday through the hallways he walked closely to the lockers. I had no
idea people lived that way! I wrote it down.
You hear someone share about their journey with homosexuality, maybe on a talk show, or a conversation. What were their struggles, their
thoughts,
what did people say to them? Write down their exact words, The
devil has no new tricks, what he says to one he has said to another. Listen to
those around you, especially your students. There are students who are
self-aware and more articulate than others, listen to them. Their words will be the key to help free other students who are unable to express what is going on inside. Developing an X-Marks the spot list is a powerful exercise as it will help you to pay attention to people’s pain and better understand why people do what they do.
You
do not have to be the Been-There-Done-That
person in order to relate to students. Just be an excellent listener and you
will connect and relate to students in a world that is not your own.
If you would like a copy of Teen
Issues: X Marks the Spot List
or if you have further questions about how to use it. Email me at alison@itgspeakers.com
--------------------------------
A member of the Canadian Association of Professional
Speakers (CAPS) Alison has dedicated her time to developing her gift of Public
Speaking so that her listeners would believe the truth that she shares and to
raise up other strong youth communicator’s in Canada. She has been speaking
full time for four years and is currently enrolled in Youth Speakers
University.
Speaking Tips are from Alison’s Public Speaking
Enhancement Workshop for any inquires message her today. http://www.inspiringteengreatness.com
