Showing posts with label bullying. Show all posts
Showing posts with label bullying. Show all posts

Friday, 1 March 2013

Untouchable in Youth Ministry


There are many topics that we cover over the years of our youth ministry careers. Topics that bring hope, challenge, truth, salvation, theology, belief, social justice, and so many more.

I have come to realize that those of us in youth ministry also have topics that we will not touch. Oh we might brush over them or mention them but we not get deep down and research them enough to make them a topic or series for our kids. Topics like:
  • homosexuality
  • abortion
  • bullying
  • disability
  • prejudice
  • finances
  • gluttony
  • cutting
  • etc…
We must embrace all topics from a biblical standpoint, yet we must tell the truth in love. If we tell the truth without love, the truth becomes irrelevant.

We must be willing to tackle these and other topics that our youth are talking about, hearing about, experiencing, and wrestling with so that you can teach them to see love in action from a biblical perspective.

Tackling any one of these issues will take great courage. You will need to be well researched, submit it to prayer and God's leading, as well as having others praying for you. You are heading in to uncharted waters.

The one thing I beg of you is this; if you cannot talk truthfully about any of these topics without love, please don't. We have had too many others that have spoken about these topics without love and they have made us all embarrassed that they are claiming to represent the rest of us by calling themselves Christians.

What untouchable topics have you opened up in your youth ministry?
What topics or research are you currently doing on and untouchable?
What questions do you have about these untouchable topics?

Saturday, 17 November 2012

Public Speaking Tips: Can You Relate?


"...Just because they're in a church, it doesn't mean that everyone has it all together. My advice would be to talk about things that are real and relevant to today's youth." - Katelyn 17
 Can you relate to issues of divorce, blended families, cutting, rape, and random texts of topless girls when you have never experienced it yourself? It’s not an option, YOU NEED TO RELATE! In this blog, I will show you how you can connect with your teen audience in a world that is not your own.     
Speak The Language Of Pain And Their Trust You Will Gain.
I have a list. A list that helps me speak the language of pain. Not just any pain, but the pain and experiences that youth go through. I started this document back in 2006 it’s called Teen Issues:  X Marks the Spot (In this blog I will refer to it as The List). In this document I lists various issues/topics that teens face from bullying, to blended families, being the class clown, to being judged in the church. Beside the topic I have written a detailed description of what teens experience and face, according to the topic.

Bullying:  People you don’t know jump you, they shove, push and beat on you. You walk close to the lockers because you’ve learned it lessens the pain when they shove you into them.
That description of bullying may not make sense to you. But a young guy who hears you say those words in your message, will lift his head and look into your eyes. His ears perk up because you are speaking his language, the language of his pain. To him, it feels like you can see right through him, you see his pain, you understand. He now hangs off of every word that proceeds out of your mouth including the message of hope. That same boy will come up to you after the message is over and share his secret life of silent torture with you because you get him. You spoke the language of pain.
 “I think a youth pastor should be willing to stay in touch with youth culture (ex. current video games, celebrities, etc.) and use current language.”- Hunter 19
 How do you develop this list? Through the gift of listening. A friend shared his story about how he was bullied in Junior and Senior High School. Everyday through the hallways he walked closely to the lockers. I had no idea people lived that way! I wrote it down.
You hear someone share about their journey with homosexuality, maybe on a talk show, or a conversation. What were their struggles, their thoughts, what did people say to them? Write down their exact words, The devil has no new tricks, what he says to one he has said to another. Listen to those around you, especially your students. There are students who are self-aware and more articulate than others, listen to them. Their words will be the key to help free other students who are unable to express what is going on inside.  Developing an X-Marks the spot list is a powerful exercise as it will help you to pay attention to people’s pain and better understand why people do what they do. 
You do not have to be the Been-There-Done-That person in order to relate to students. Just be an excellent listener and you will connect and relate to students in a world that is not your own.

If you would like a copy of Teen Issues:  X Marks the Spot List or if you have further questions about how to use it. Email me at alison@itgspeakers.com
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A member of the Canadian Association of Professional Speakers (CAPS) Alison has dedicated her time to developing her gift of Public Speaking so that her listeners would believe the truth that she shares and to raise up other strong youth communicator’s in Canada. She has been speaking full time for four years and is currently enrolled in Youth Speakers University.
Speaking Tips are from Alison’s Public Speaking Enhancement Workshop for any inquires message her today. http://www.inspiringteengreatness.com

Friday, 27 July 2012

New Microsoft Study Measures Pervasiveness of Cyberbullying


Filed by Kelsey Herron
While it’s not always called by the same name and its definition varies across cultures, cyberbullying—bullying using digital media— is a universal problem that has more than peppered our news headlines over the past year. To gauge just how pervasive online bullying has become, Microsoft recently commissioned a study [pdf] asking children about their negative experiences online. Instead of using buzz words like “cyberbullying,” which some children may be hesitant to use, the study used terms on par with the language of each child’s age group. Questions about being “called mean names” or “teased” were asked in particular.  One of the main objectives of the study was to learn about the harm that happens online by all who experience it, regardless of whether they consider it  “bullying” or not.
According to its results, 37 percent of children surveyed said they have been subjected to “a range of online activities that some may consider to be bullying or to have adverse effects,” for example mean or unfriendly treatment, teasing, and name-calling online. The sample was composed of children from 25 different countries, ages 8 to 17. Microsoft did not say how many children were included in the study, or provide detail their survey methods.
The findings fall into five main sections:
  • Knowledge and concern
  • Bullying
  • Steps to help protect children online
  • School policy and education
  • Demographics
While responses were nearly split down the middle regarding awareness and concern about being bullied online, the study found that most bullying still occurs where it has for decades – offline. Results also showed that those who bully online are approximately twice as likely to be victims of cyberbullying themselves.
Teens (aged 13 to 17) are more likely to be bullied online than those ages 8 to 12. This finding likely relates to the increasing amount of time teens are spending online, as well as having less parental supervision than younger children. As expected, teens were also slightly more knowledgeable about cyberbullying, and better educated on how to deal with harmful online situations.
Another noteworthy finding is that parents take an average of three steps to ensure their children’s online safety. According to youth surveyed, half of parents talked with them about online risks, and 44 percent monitored their use of the computer. It was unclear if this monitoring included mobile devices.
Youth weighed in on the kind of education they had received outside the home as well. According to survey findings, 23 percent of schools have formal policies addressing online bullying, and 37 percent provide some form of education. Out of that 37 percent, fewer than half offer guidance to parents, and only 8 percent provide training for teachers.
We understand the importance of educating the educators on cyberbullying, which is why Common Sense Media has a free online cyberbullying toolkit just for teachers. The toolkit is categorized by age group, with each section designed to prepare students for online situations they may not be expecting. Lessons cover everything from teaching young children to be a positive “upstander” in their online communities, to encouraging high school students to “dial down” online cruelty when they see it. The curriculum is equipped with thorough resources for administrators, kids, teens, and parents; and also includes a brand new cyberbullying responseflowchart for school officials.
Raising awareness about cyberbullying has become a growing mainstream concern. Just this past week New York Governor Andrew Cuomo signed a bill requiring teachers to take action against cyberbullying, regardless of whether it occurs off campus. Even high-profile celebrities have taken stances against the issue, the most noteworthy being Lady Gaga. Earlier this year the pop singer launched the Born this Way Foundation aiming to foster a “more accepting society” and encourage youth to create safe environments to foster individuality.

Friday, 27 April 2012

Code of Conduct


Alain Virgin from Brideltowne Park Church, Scarborough came up with this code of conduct and communicated to his students in a fun and creative way. Alain is doing a great job in his urban youth ministry context. Check out their group on Facebook.

Do you have a code of conduct for your youth ministry? What is Alain missing that you would add?



Jeff Smyth is husband to Heather and father of one active boy Nathan. He has been involved youth ministry leadership for 15 years in both the local church and non-profit areas of Canada. He has been serving for the past 3 years as the coordinator of community initiatives with DOXAToronto.com the Scarborough arm of Youth Unlimited (Toronto YFC). Learn more about him by visiting ThinkYouthMinistry.com or follow him @jeffsmyth

Friday, 30 March 2012

Bullying in Youth Ministry

What do you teach from the bible about bullying?

If you don't have a plan, get one. Don't know where to start? Contact me, I'll help you. If you don't think it's worth teaching or even addressing in youth ministry, you should step out of your role in youth ministry and find another vocation?

Why do we only care about the spiritual lives of the kids in our youth groups and not their physical and emotional needs as well?

The Bully Project is in select theatre today.
MUST SEE movie for all youth workers.

Jeff Smyth is husband to Heather and father of one active boy Nathan. He has been involved youth ministry leadership for 15 years in both the local church and non-profit areas of Canada. He has been serving for the past 3 years as the coordinator of community initiatives with DOXAToronto.com the Scarborough are of Youth Unlimited (Toronto YFC). Learn more about him by visiting his blog ThinkYouthMinistry.com or follow him @jeffsmyth